


Lose Yourself

by kronette



Category: Sorority Boys (2002)
Genre: Bisexuality, Crossdressing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-14
Updated: 2012-12-14
Packaged: 2017-11-21 02:14:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/592316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kronette/pseuds/kronette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The scenes we didn’t see after the cruise and before the end credits.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lose Yourself

**Author's Note:**

> Completed October 2002 and posted under my other pseud, Shelley Wright.

He stared at the mirror, fully expecting to see the huge ass and badly painted eyelids, but only dark, unruly hair and day-old stubble stared back at him. 

Just Adam. 

Only ‘just Adam’ didn’t exist anymore. 

He was one of the popular guys all through school. The one everyone liked. The one who fucked any girl he wanted, and rejected those he didn’t in the most embarrassing, horrible ways. 

Ways that Adina had been subjected to. 

Being insecure wasn’t something he knew how to deal with. Insecurity was for those who didn’t know who they were or what they wanted. He was Adam, proud member – and now president – of the KOK brotherhood. Only – not quite as proud as he’d once been. Taking the “walk” that so fucking many girls had done before him, made him see just how crass and vulgar the ritual was. How humiliating. How degrading. He stared at the mirror, trying not to see the deep, sad eyes reflected back at him, filled with tears. Adina’s eyes. Adina’s feelings. Adina’s hurt. 

He wrapped his arms around himself, hands tightening on his biceps as he fought down his emotions. It hurt to be rejected. It hurt to be made fun of. It hurt to be called ugly and teased about your fat ass, but what hurt most of all was that it was true. Adina was ugly. She did have a fat ass. She was tormented because of what she looked like, and no one cared to see beyond that. Jimmy was the only one who looked at her like she was someone special, and he’d used her. 

Adam knew Jimmy was lying about “that night”. His ass wasn’t sore, but the cum stains on Adina’s skirt didn’t belong to Adam. It turned his stomach that Jimmy tried to have sex with Adina while she was unconscious, but how many times had Adam used women that way? How many times had he felt proud when the chanting started? The smart women climbed out the bedroom window; the ones with some modicum of pride. The ones who didn’t want to end up on his wall. 

The pictures were burning in a trash can behind him, along with the video tapes. He didn’t even look at them; just dumped them all in the can and torched it. The fumes were thick in the room, but the slight breeze carried in enough fresh air that he didn’t kill himself. Wouldn’t that be ironic? To almost lose everything, get it back, only to lose it all just as he was regaining his life? 

Dark circles under his eyes proved just how close he was to his ironic threshold. Pinned over the pictures of his conquests, right in the middle, had been the latest addition. Teary-eyed, wild blond hair, and face streaked with makeup: Adina. They’d put her picture in the place of honor. He almost threw up when he saw it. 

He remembered all the eyes on him, the chanting, and the deliberate trip from Tony – all for the DOG Adina. A tear slipped down his cheek and he angrily wiped it away. She didn’t deserve it. She fucking didn’t deserve it. 

His melancholy was quickly replaced by anger. He’d show those bastards. Adina could be pretty. He would show all those fuckers just who he was. He grabbed a duffle bag and stormed over to the DOG house, his determined steps causing everyone to circle around him. Up the short flight of stairs without a thought, he knocked on the door and impatiently waited for someone to open it. Thirty seconds passed, and he rang the bell. Another thirty seconds, and with a quick glance around to make sure no one was watching, he slipped inside. He listened carefully as he made his way upstairs and into Adina’s room. 

All his anxiety drained away as he leaned against the closed door. Just being in the room calmed him. He made his way to his closet and started filling the bag. Tops, skirts, and shoes jumbled together in a sea of pink, orange and blue. He swept an arm across the top of the dressing table, dropping the jewelry and make-up on top of the clothes. He paused as he tried to remember what he’d done with the wig. He wasn’t sure if it’d made it back from the boat. He dropped to his knees and pawed through the bottom of the closet, looking for a spare, even though he knew he didn’t have one. Panic rose in his chest, and he tore through the top of the closet, then went to Daisy’s and started going through hers. He tossed items behind him, muttering, “Please, please be here,” as an ache replaced the panic. 

“Adam?” 

He spun around, twisting his legs in the clothes and landing on his ass. Katie stood in the doorway, staring down at him curiously. He never would have guessed it was her, as her voice was barely above a whisper. 

“Um, Katie, hi,” he said, his voice sounding lame – and higher than it should. His eyes widened as he stared as his pseudo sorority sister, then he picked himself off the floor. He started to shove clothes back into the closet, keeping his back to her. “Sorry about the mess. I left something here that I’d really hate to lose. I just can’t find it…”

He stared in shock as Adina’s wig appeared at his left. He looked up at Katie’s solemn face, and something inside him broke. His hand shook as he reached out and took it, cradling it to his chest. “How?” he choked as he stroked the blond locks. 

“Sometimes, it’s easier for others to see things,” Katie said with a shrug. “I thought you might need it.” 

Touching the synthetic hair was like nothing he’d ever experienced. When he first put it on, he’d hated it. He thought it made him weak and helpless, and it had – because he’d let it. Standing up for himself as a woman was no different from standing up for himself as a man. The difference was in how others perceived him. And the women of DOG – this woman – saw him as someone special. Tears pricked his eyes, and he swallowed a giggle. Women’s intuition was not to be taken lightly. “I don’t know how to thank you,” he murmured, allowing Adina’s voice to speak for him. He let his gratitude shine through his gaze and watery smile. 

Katie smiled back and stood on tip-toe to kiss his cheek. “Self-esteem comes from deep inside, and you helped draw mine out. I’m just returning the favor.” 

He couldn’t speak; only nod as his smile faltered. He studied the wig as he stroked it, his fingers catching on the clips he’d used to style it. One thing he was always proud of: Adina’s hair. She may not have had the best fashion sense, but her hair looked good. 

“Do you want some help?” Katie’s soft voice asked. 

He nodded again, and Katie guided him to a chair. They spent the next few hours trimming, waxing, primping and adjusting. Finally standing on shaky legs, he walked to the closet door and turned the mirror to his gaze. Staring back was Adina, but not Adina. Adina, only better. 

“Katie,” he breathed, drawing fingertips along his gracefully highlighted cheekbones. He smoothed hands down the deep blue dress that fell softly around his hips, the hemline coming to just above the knee. He turned sideways and stared in shock at his ass. It wasn’t big and grotesque. It was shapely, not as wide as it had been – it was nice. “Katie,” he repeated, turning with a bright smile at his friend. “This is – I’m –“

“You may not win any beauty contests, but you’re not a dog,” Katie said. 

He glared at her. “You’re wrong,” he said firmly. “I am a DOG – a sister of the sorority Delta Omicron Gamma.” He straightened up to his full 5’10” and tossed his head, hands on hips. “And I’m gorgeous.” 

Katie tried to stifle a giggle, but ended up choking. Adam pounded on her back, and Katie held up her hand to ward her off. “You’ve still got the strength of a football jock; try not to break anything, okay?” 

Adam rubbed Katie’s back in apology. “Oh, God, I’m sorry! Are you all right?” 

“I’m not fragile,” Katie remarked with a smirk. “I just need to catch my breath.” 

“As long as you’re okay,” Adam said with relief. 

“I’m fine,” Katie replied as she straightened. Adam felt her scrutiny and made himself hold her gaze. “What were you planning to do?” 

What was he planning to do? His only real thought was to show the KOK’s they didn’t hold any power over him. He had a vague plan of walking by the frat house as Adina, and then a brilliant idea caused him to smile. “I’m going to class.” 

Katie looked him over for a minute, but this time it was easy to meet her eyes. He knew what he was going to do, and he was committed to it. 

“Can I walk with you to class?” Katie asked. 

His smile bloomed larger. “Of course. Just let me get my bag.” He tossed his jeans and shirt into the duffle bag, zipped it shut, then hefted it onto his shoulder. He linked his arm through Katie’s, and headed to her room. Katie gathered her books and purse, loaned him a notebook and pen, and together they left the DOG house. 

Walking in low heels was much easier than walking in the stilts he’d been wearing the past week. He could keep his balance, and even managed a sway to his hips. He felt the dress swish around his knees, caressing his skin, and his smile grew bolder. They passed a few KOK’s, and he kept his head high, refusing to let them know about the butterflies in his stomach. All the KOK’s were sworn to secrecy about everything that happened on the KOK-tail cruise, which included Adam, Dave and Robert’s “transformation”. That didn’t mean they wouldn’t say something to his face. The stares were hard to ignore, but thankfully, Adam couldn’t hear anything they said. 

“Are you okay?” Katie murmured as they ascended the stairs to the main lecture hall. 

He realized he’d been gripping Katie’s arm, and immediately relaxed his fingers. “Yeah,” he breathed. “I wanted to do this; I just didn’t know how hard it was going to be.” 

“You’re doing fine,” Katie assured him. “You don’t have to continue, you know. You’ve shown them…”

“No,” he cut her off abruptly. “I’m going to class. I can make it one day at least.” He owed Adina that much. 

Katie nodded. “All right. How about I meet you after your last class? At the student union?” 

The thought of all those eyes fixated on him was suddenly too much. “How about the library? It’s closer to the house.” 

Katie’s hand squeezed his arm. “Sure. The library it is. About four o’clock?” 

“Sure,” he agreed. They stopped outside his class and he took a deep breath. “I’ll see you then.” He felt Katie’s presence leave his side, and coldness seeped into his bones. He was going to go through with this. He was going to be fine. He just had to get through an hour and a half, and then he could hide in the janitor’s closet for two hours until his next class. No big deal. 

He pushed open the heavy door, his eyes sweeping the room. No one turned to look at him, so he slid into the first empty seat he spotted. He breathed a sigh of relief and leaned down to get the notebook and pen from his bag. He located the notebook easily enough, but couldn’t find the pen. “Shit,” he muttered as he wiggled his hand to the depths of the bag. 

“Here.” 

Startled, he looked over at the pen being held out, into the face of a guy he didn’t recognize. He glanced warily at the seat that had been vacant seconds before, then back at the guy. 

The guy’s smile widened as he held his hands up in a placating gesture. “It’s just a pen. Not a date.” 

Adam searched the guy’s face, looking for any sign of deceit. The guy wasn’t a KOK; he didn’t look like he belonged to any fraternity. He didn’t have the look that Adam used on women he wanted to bang. He looked – casually interested, but not threatening. Adam extracted his hand from the bag and took the pen with a soft, “Thank you.” 

The guy settled back in his chair, and Adam tried to give him no more thought, but the guy obviously was in a chatty mood. 

“I don’t remember seeing you in this class before.” 

It was a pick-up line; a bad pick-up line. Adam didn’t know whether to laugh or slug the guy. “I’m only auditing it today,” he explained, hoping it would put the guy off. 

“So, you’re only here for one day?” the guy asked with a disappointed frown. 

“Yes,” Adam answered, trying to put as much emphasis into his voice as he could. He was unnerved that the guy seemed interested. He knew Adina looked better with Katie’s help, but he didn’t think it was interested better. Just…not ugly better. 

“That’s a shame,” the guy murmured, as the professor entered the classroom. 

Adam was grateful for the distraction. The guy’s attention was starting to make him nervous. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the guy flip open his notebook and write something down. 

“My name’s Frank. I’d really like it if you’d meet me here tonight,” Frank whispered as he dropped a folded piece of paper on Adam’s notebook. 

Adam stared at the paper, eyes wide, then up at Frank. He still didn’t see any ulterior motives on Frank’s face, and he knew what to look for. With a start, he snapped out of it. He was still a guy, and he wasn’t going to meet a guy at some bar! Just because he wanted Adina to get the respect she deserved, didn’t mean he was gay or something. Just because his fingers shook slightly as he picked up the piece of paper and tucked it into his notebook, didn’t mean he was gay—or something. 

And just because he smiled over at Frank, then lowered his lashes coquettishly, didn’t mean he was gay. He just wanted to prove that Adina was pretty and could attract a guy, and she had. He had. Whatever. 

And just because he stayed in his seat after class was over and decided to talk to Frank, that didn’t mean anything, either. He was only being friendly. “I’m Adina, by the way,” he said.

“Adina. That’s…unusual,” Frank replied. 

His laugh was just a little bit forced. “My parents were a bit out of it when they thought of it, I guess,” he deflected, throwing in a hand gesture he’d seen women do – a flick of the wrist that looked easy, but hurt. He felt something pop and covered up the slight pain with a smile. “So, are – are you a sophomore, too?” he inquired, hating that his voice cracked. It wasn’t easy to maintain Adina’s higher pitch without it cracking, plus it sounded really fake, but the breathless whisper wasn’t appealing in this situation. 

Frank didn’t seem to notice. “Yeah, I’m a transfer student from UCLA.” He leaned closer. “I don’t think I’ve seen you around campus before. Are you new, too?”

Adam inhaled sharply, catching the hint of cologne and struggled with himself whether to bolt out of the room or not. Instincts were screaming at him to end this now, to just walk away and change out of the dress and wig and burn them, but something inside wouldn’t let him. He didn’t know what it was yet, but he couldn’t ignore it. 

But how could he answer that question? He was new, just not in the way Frank was implying. He toyed with the edge of his notebook, mind searching desperately for something to say. “I – I’ve been here the entire year,” he said, deciding that some honesty couldn’t hurt. “You must not have noticed me.” 

Frank’s smile caused him to squirm. “Oh, I think I would have noticed you before.” 

Adam sighed as Frank’s watch beeped, deflecting the conversation away from Adina. 

“Adina, I hate to do this, but I have to go. I’m supposed to meet someone.”

He knew it. A guy would only be interested in Adina for what she could give him, not anything else. “A girlfriend?” he teased in the best ‘knowing’ voice he could muster. 

Frank’s smile turned…playful. “You could say that, but it’s not what you think. I hope you’ll be there tonight. I think you’ll be surprised.” 

Adam’s eyebrow rose. “Oh, I don’t doubt one of us will be surprised,” he commented lightly, belatedly realizing he’d agreed to show. He hoped Frank missed that slip, but the light shining in Frank’s eyes said he hadn’t. 

“If you’re not there by eight o’clock, I’ll assume you won’t show.” Frank placed a hand over his heart and tilted his head slightly. “And I’ll be very hurt, but I’ll understand. It was nice to meet you either way, Adina.” 

Adam watched Frank leave, biting his lip in consternation. What did he mean, he’d understand? How could he understand? ‘Hi Frank, sorry I couldn’t show, but you see, I’m a guy, too.’ Somehow, Adam didn’t think that would go over too well. And why was he even entertaining the idea of showing? He was still a guy, even if he was in a dress. A guy who felt like he was flirting with another guy. A guy who was going to meet up with said guy around eight o’clock that night. Who wondered what happened to him in the past two weeks that he could be this confused. 

He shoved his notebook in the bag and hefted it onto his shoulder, walking out of the empty classroom. His steps carried him to the library, and he found a table tucked away on the upper floor. He slid into the chair and propped his head in his hand. What was happening to him? Didn’t he love women? The ache in his dick in its current confines answered that well enough for him. He loved women. Loved their breasts, their softness, and their internal heat. God, the heat was incredible around his cock. He bit off a soft moan and adjusted himself. He’d gone almost two weeks without sex, and for him that constituted a dry spell the likes of the Sahara. Maybe that’s why he was flirting with Frank. He was so horny that he’d take interest wherever he could get it, even a guy. A cute guy, actually, with his grayish eyes, tousled brown hair, a couple of days of stubble; nicely dressed, but not preppy… 

Okay, he must really be desperate, because he was cataloging a guy. He steered his thoughts to the Tri Pi’s and their incredible, wide mouths, and felt his cock twitch in appreciation. Confusion averted for the time being, he felt confident enough to head back to the quad and sit outside. Just a few hours more, then Adina could disappear forever. He picked a spot away from the fountain, under the shade of a tree, and stretched out, careful to arrange the dress to hide his accessories. He attempted to read the assigned chapters for the class he’d just left, but after a few moments, gave up and started to people-watch. He didn’t get many looks his way, and that was fine with him. He wasn’t being ogled or teased; he just was. He relaxed and crossed his ankles, almost comfortable. 

Then Jimmy walked by, and Adam couldn’t draw air into his lungs. He couldn’t move; couldn’t think, and Jimmy caught sight of him and stopped. Dead. Adam closed his eyes, unwilling to see the look on Jimmy’s face, but it was ingrained on the back of his eyelids: shock, disgust, fear – and he swore he saw a hint of lust. Absolutely not. Jimmy was never getting his hands on Adina again. 

Adina wasn’t real. He took a breath finally and began a mantra to himself. Adina wasn’t real, and Jimmy didn’t have sex with him. Adam was nearly positive Jimmy just dry-humped him; hence the stain on the outside of his skirt. Besides, he was fully clothed when he woke up. Jimmy wouldn’t have had the presence of mind to redress him, and Jimmy would have noticed the extra equipment. It was still embarrassing, and the color on Jimmy’s cheeks said it wasn’t just on Adam’s part. Gathering his courage, Adam called out, “Jimmy.” 

Jimmy’s mouth worked around the “A” part of his name, but Adam wasn’t sure which he was trying to say: Adam or Adina. It didn’t really matter, because Adam got to his feet, walked over to Jimmy, and looked him square in the eye. “If you say a word of this to anyone, especially a bro, I will pull your ass inside out and roast your balls for the next party. Understood?” 

Jimmy nodded so hard Adam thought his head would fly off. “Good. Now, run along to class and forget you saw me.” 

Jimmy nodded again, but didn’t move for almost a minute. Then he all but ran across campus. Adam watched him go, willing his insides to stop twisting around. He tried to take a step, but his knees almost gave out, and he took deep breaths until he was sure he could move without falling over. He walked to the nearest building, located the restroom, and threw up. 

He rested his head on the toilet until the dizziness passed. That confrontation was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do in his life, but he did it. He’d stood up to Jimmy, and the fact that he was shaking on the bathroom floor after emptying his stomach didn’t matter. It didn’t matter. He’d been confident and calm, and that was the important thing. They didn’t win. 

He heard voices and the door opening, and remembered the women’s bathrooms rarely stayed empty. He quickly got to his feet and wiped off his mouth, flushed the toilet, and straightened his dress. He rinsed his mouth out at the sink after the women were safely in stalls, and stared at himself in the mirror. He was pale and still a little shaky, but he’d never felt better. He touched up his make-up and hair, then set off across campus to his next class. 

By the time he met Katie at the library, he was smiling again. 

“It looks like you had a good day,” Katie commented as he slid into the seat next to her. 

He thought about it. “Yes, I did,” he answered, and meant it. “How about you?” 

Katie shrugged. “It’s getting better. The teasing’s stopped, and I feel almost normal.” 

“Only ‘almost normal’?” Adam teased. 

“Hey!” Katie growled and punched his arm. “I said the teasing has stopped. That means from you, too.” 

“Sooorrryyy,” he drawled. “I guess I won’t invite you to the KOK/DOG party I was planning.” 

Katie instantly brightened and squealed, “Party? You didn’t tell me you were planning a party!”

In truth, it just occurred to him, but it made sense. One of his promises at accepting the presidency was that he wouldn’t uphold the traditions of KOK, and he meant it. As much as he loved the Tri Pi’s bodies, he genuinely liked the women of DOG. Their fairly-won party on the cruise was ruined, and he intended to make it up to them. “Yep, I was going to make up for the disastrous cruise, but if the DOG’s aren’t interested…”

Katie’s voice returned to its normal volume in her excitement. “Are you insane? Of course we’re interested!” 

“Shh!” hissed several librarians, and they both giggled softly. 

“Let’s get out of here,” Adam whispered. “Wouldn’t want to disturb the studious nature of the collegiate life, now would we?” He nudged a sleeping student on his way out, startling the guy awake. 

They muffled their giggles as best they could until they reached the entrance to the library, then burst into laughter as they crossed the threshold and continued down the steps. 

“Adina, you are so bad,” Katie breathed. 

“Honey, I’m so bad, I’m good,” he shot back, his smile vanishing as he felt eyes on him. He glanced around, spotting Frank staring at him across the quad. Frank was squinting in the sun, and Adam clutched the bag strap tight to his chest in abject terror. Why was he staring? Other people were slowing down and following Frank’s gaze, and Adam felt exposed. The flicker of interest from a woman was sensual; this felt feral, and he was lost as to how to handle it. 

He made the mistake of looking up, and locked gazes with Frank. Something unidentifiable hit him low in his gut. “Oh,” he breathed as the wind tousled Frank’s hair even more, then he hissed as his cock protested its restraint. 

“Adina, are you okay?” he dimly heard Katie ask.

What was wrong with him? Why couldn’t he look away? His stomach rolled, his heart started pounding in his chest – and his face hurt from the smile he was broadcasting across the quad. It widened as Frank smiled back, then with a final wave, Frank headed into the lecture hall, Adam’s gaze following him up the stairs. 

“Adam,” Katie hissed directly in his ear, and he jerked out of wherever he’d been.

“Yeah,” he said. “I’m fine.” It was a lie. He wasn’t fine. He didn’t think he’d ever be fine again. He checked out Frank’s ass, and it was a nice ass. His cock thought so, too. He closed his eyes, forcing down questions he didn’t want to examine right then. “Katie, why don’t you go back to the house? I need some time to think.” He made sure it wasn’t phrased as a question. 

Katie’s voice was skeptical. “I don’t think you should be alone right now.”

He sent her a reassuring smile. “I’ve still got the strength of a football jock; I’ll be fine.” He made shooing motions. “Go on. Tell everyone about the party. Next weekend.” 

She still seemed reluctant to leave him. “Okay. If that’s what you really want.”

“It is what I really want.” He pushed her gently. “Now, go. You’re cramping my style.” 

Finally, Katie left him with one last concerned glance, and he found a nearby wall to hold himself upright. 

He thought of how confident Dave was as Daisy. How completely unconcerned Doofer had been to dress like a woman. Why was he the only one who had issues? Dave dressed conservatively, Doofer wildly, but Adam wanted to look sexy. He wanted people to notice him. He wanted the attention he got as Adina to be the same as he normally got as Adam. But they weren’t women. They had dicks and loved pussy and didn’t give a fuck about women’s insecurities. Hell, he’d stared at the Tri Pi’s tits during the Powder Puff football game! So why did his cock jump at the thought of Frank’s ass? How fucked up was he? Who was he? 

He looked heavenward and hoped for an answer to fall out of the sky. The flicker of sunlight through the trees in the quad didn’t offer him anything, so he started walking. He heard the whispers and snickers as he walked past groups of students, but ignored them. They weren’t important. He was stuck in an endless loop of ‘who am I’ questions, only he couldn’t find any answers. 

Maybe a stiff drink or ten would help. Stiff drink. Stiff cock. Frank’s cock heavy in his hand – no. Not going to go there. He didn’t care that he seemed to be well beyond ‘there’ and was heading into ‘fucking hot’ territory. He could lie to himself for a few hours more. A few lifetimes more. 

He dug his wallet out of the bag and checked that he had more than enough for a cab, then flagged one down. He took out the notebook and Frank’s note, and read the address in a monotone to the driver. He didn’t recognize the street, and as they passed the strip of known bars, he gnawed on his lip nervously. How far out was this place? Why hadn’t he heard of it before? Finally, the cab stopped in front of a plain brick building. He barely registered the snort of laughter as he paid the driver and left the cab. 

A bulk of a doorman stood off to one side, so Adam headed that way. He could hear the music now, pulsing techno like in any other club. He relaxed slightly, only to hit near-panic as the bouncer asked for ID. 

“Um, couldn’t I just take a quick peek and then come right back out?” He tried a smile, but knew it failed spectacularly. 

“Sorry,” the bouncer said, not looking the least bit sorry. 

Adam figured it was a sign. He wasn’t supposed to be here. He should go home and burn all of Adina’s clothes, and forget it ever happened, like he should have done in the first place. 

Then a voice called out, “It’s okay George, Adina’s with me.” 

Adam frowned at the woman, who shook her head slightly. “I’ve been waiting for you,” the woman said, holding out her hand. 

He was sure he’d never seen this woman before, but what else did he have to do? Go back to the KOK house and mope? Adam stepped forward and took her hand – it was as big as his own – and allowed the woman to pull him inside the club, right past the bouncer. The flashing lights took a moment to adjust to, but once they did, the club looked like any other dance club. He leaned close to the woman and yelled over the music, “Thanks.” 

She smiled at him, and a jolt of recognition flashed through him. “Do I know you?” he asked. 

The woman squeezed his hand – he hadn’t even realized she was still holding on to it. “Francesca.” Her grip was firm as she continued, “I believe we met in class today.” 

Adam blinked. Stared. Leaned closer and saw the familiar grayish eyes beneath the mascara and eyeliner. His world tilted, and the breath whooshed out of him. “Frank?”

He was corrected with a stern, “It’s Francesca in here.” 

“I’m sorry,” he stammered, confusion quickly becoming his new best friend. “I don’t…”

“You’re new,” Francesca observed casually with a shrug. “I understand. It’ll take you a bit to get used to how we do things, but really, it’s not that hard. It’s all about respect.” 

He suddenly knew how Alice felt in Wonderland. “I’m sorry,” he repeated, holding up a hand. “How we do things? Who’s ‘we’? And why would I care?” 

Francesca’s hand smoothed over his jawbone, fingertips gliding along his Adam’s apple, down to the open throat of his dress. It was sensuous, and daring, and sent fire through Adam’s bloodstream. Heart thudding beneath Francesca’s hand, eyes locked on Francesca’s lips as they moved closer, a tiny sound escaped him as they passed his lips and settled on his throat. The light sucking on the underside of his jaw drew another sound of need from his depths. His hands found Francesca’s hips, pulling her closer. His cock was bordering on painful as it swelled against its tight constraint. Lowered his head to taste skin – tongue lapping at her neck, teeth nipping gently just below her ear, feeling the rough hairs that the razor missed back there. Felt a moan building up inside of him, and dug his fingers into flesh as Francesca bit his ear. 

“This is ‘we’,” she murmured in his ear. 

Adam couldn’t catch his breath, and his heart felt like it would explode any second. “No,” he gasped, unwilling to voice what his mind could barely process. What he’d been avoiding all day. “I like tits. I fucking love them.” 

Rough hands grabbed his chest and pushed. “And so you put them on,” Francesca hissed. “You think I don’t love them, too? You don’t have to choose one or the other. You can have both. Shit, most of the Tri Pi’s have been in three-ways with guys before. It turns them on almost as much as it does us.” 

Tears leaked out of his tightly closed eyes, willing the words away. He couldn’t do this. Couldn’t be this. He was the president of the KOK fraternity, the go-to guy, the fucking stud of the frat house…

And he was arching up into a guy’s hand cupping his cock and moaning like a bitch in heat. “Please,” he whispered. Begged. Demanded. Cursed. 

Mouth against his, smear of lipstick, textures and flavors never explored now melting on his tongue. He devoured, craved, needed like never before. Careful of his hands at Francesca’s neck, careful of the wig, fingers dug into strong muscles of her neck and shoulder. Thigh between his, pushing against his cock, causing him to sob at the unbearable ache. “Please,” he murmured again, desperation clawing at the edges of his sanity. 

Pulled into the club, into a back room, behind a door that didn’t drown out the noise. A small bare bulb clicked on overhead, revealing a bed and a table. A basket of assorted condoms and tubes sat in the middle of the table like a fucking flower vase, and boxes of handi-wipes and tissues littered the floor. No doubt in his mind what this room was for. 

“Privacy. Fairly clean,” Francesca apologized as she pushed him against the wall. “Want this to be fucking fantastic for you. So damn hot. Tight sweater trying to hide your big tits. Nice ass. Incredible legs up to your fucking neck.” 

The litany interspersed with deep kisses and strangled moans, hands coaxing under his dress to cup his balls and cock. He nearly bit Francesca’s tongue as he sucked it into his mouth. Eager hands, eager tongues, eager cocks. It was dangerous and insane and fucking hot, Francesca was right, and his hips were rocking against hers already. He whimpered as air hit his cock, the confining boxer-briefs riding low on his hips now, and he split Francesca’s lower lip as his cock was stroked. Rough. Hard. Demanding he let go. Demanding Adam accept this part of himself. 

“God, please,” he hissed as he threw his head back. He was so damn close – a suck on his Adam’s apple was the push he needed. “Yes,” he wailed as orgasm ripped him apart at the molecular level and rebuilt him. 

Strong, shaky arms held him upright. Harsh breath panted against his neck. A heavy weight pressed against his entire body, too comfortable for something so new. “Fuck,” he croaked, his throat sore from yelling. 

Frank’s chuckle shook them both. “Fuck is right. You’re a handful.” 

“Thanks,” he remarked dryly. Amazing what a little mind-blowing sex could do to alter your worldview. So what if he was gay-bi-whatever? It just meant he could have even more mind-blowing sex. And wasn’t that what he was in college for? 

He shifted minutely, wrinkling his nose at the sticky mess between his legs. His eyes widened as he felt a distinct hardness against his right thigh. “Um…what about…” 

A soft kiss deflected his question. “This was for you.” 

Great. Stubborn male pride didn’t disappear with…this. “Dude, you’ve got to be in pain. Let me –“ his guts twisted, but he was determined – “help you.” 

Serious gray eyes met his. “You don’t have to.” 

He narrowed his eyes, and a feral smile curled his lip just before his hand closed over Francesca’s cock. A startled gasp, then half-closed eyes told him he was doing something right. He palmed Francesca through her skirt for a few seconds, then started to work her skirt up around her waist. 

“Wait,” Francesca breathed as her hands covered Adam’s. “Bed. Now.”

He murmured a sound of approval as he moved them backward to the ancient artifact. Lips and tongues slid together, teasing playfully as they arranged themselves on the bed as best they could. Adam’s leg slipped between Francesca’s, cradling balls and cock against his thigh, drawing out a moan from them both. He dove for her throat, sucking and nipping the flesh that wasn’t quite as smooth as a woman’s – no matter how well Francesca shaved. His hands tentatively explored, growing accustomed to the feel of hard muscles beneath the soft cotton. He gasped as Francesca bucked up, hips grinding against hips, cock rubbing against cock. 

His teeth closed a bit too firmly on the skin of Francesca’s shoulder, and a drawled, “Fuuuck,” hissed past his ear. Confidence growing, he licked his way across the sharp collarbone, nipped up the arched neck, sucked at the skin below an ear, then closed his mouth over hers, swallowing her desperate moan. 

He finally got the skirt bunched around Francesca’s waist, and his hands continued up, exposing her stomach. He wasn’t used to the fake nails. He wanted to drag his fingertips across flesh, leaving the faint reddish marks that fade after a day. Since he couldn’t, he bent down and marked with teeth and lips, only stopping when hands grabbed at his shoulders.

She breathlessly gasped, “Stop. You need to – stop.” 

He wasn’t a fucking virgin. It wasn’t like he didn’t know where his nose was heading, or his mouth. He’d gotten head enough to know what he liked, and what worked. “Fuck you,” he murmured as he licked Francesca’s belly button. Intense gray eyes met his, and he slid further down, tongue leaving a wet trail on smooth skin as hands exposed more flesh. His mouth followed the same path that women’s had on his body, adding his own pleasure and secret desires to the mix. By the encouraging sounds Francesca was making, he was doing all right. He’d be doing fucking fantastic, if he could get her to make that noise again. 

He suppressed a shudder as his tongue reached the base of the cock, skin silky smooth and bare. Another shudder went straight through his body to his own cock as he licked the base, then mouthed up the length to flick the tip. An indrawn breath from both of them, and Adam wrapped a hand around Francesca’s cock, thumb rubbing against the side. He hesitated, mouth hovering at the head of Francesca’s cock. What made him think he could do this? 

“Please,” Francesca gasped, head thrashing from side to side, eyes closed and back arched. “Oh, God, please don’t stop…”

It clicked, then. He was in control. He held power in his hands. He could do anything he wanted to Francesca, and she’d just have to sit back and enjoy the ride. The feeling was fucking fantastic. Savoring the moment, he blew a stream of air over the head of Francesca’s cock, causing her to cry out again. He licked the head and sent a gust of warm breath over it before wrapping his lips around it. 

Francesca immediately bucked him off with a scream, thrusting so hard that it took all his strength to hold her down. Her tremors subsided after a moment, and Adam studied her expression. He’d never paid much attention to the women he fucked. He knew they came; he always saw to that, but he’d never noticed before. Watching Francesca come was one of the sexiest things he’d ever seen. 

When she opened her eyes, he wasn’t expecting the panic. “Oh, God,” she whispered as she pushed him upright, wiping his cheek. A smear of sticky residue caused him to frown. “Did you swallow anything?” she asked. 

His eyebrows rose. “Huh?”

“Did you swallow?” she demanded, holding up her hand, come stretching between her fingers. 

He wiped his face, feeling the come drying on his taut skin. Afraid now, he rolled his tongue around in his mouth, not noticing any odd flavor. He shook his head, and Francesca breathed a sigh of relief. 

“I can’t believe I did that,” she berated herself. “You have to believe me, I’ve never done anything like this before. I’m clean, I swear it.” 

He’d just had unprotected sex with a guy. It slammed into him then, and he started to shake. “I can’t do this,” he murmured as he got to his feet. He stumbled on his way to the door, and Francesca was right there to catch him. 

“Adina, I’m so sorry. I know you have no reason to trust me, but I am telling the truth. I’m tested every three months; I’ve always been clean. And I’m always careful.” 

“Except with guys in heels you want to fuck,” he spat, knowing it was as much his fault as hers. “I’m sorry,” he murmured, hating the hurt look on her face. “I just wasn’t expecting…”

Strong arms tightened around him. “I know, and I’m sorry.” 

He took a deep breath to calm himself. “Okay. I can handle this. We’re cool. We’ll just make sure it doesn’t happen again.” He stiffened in Francesca’s arms, realizing what he said. Again, implying that this was only the first. He didn’t know what to expect from Francesca, but the adoration wasn’t even on the list. 

“Do you want to do this again?” she asked, voice hesitant. 

He reached up a shaky hand and touched her face. “I don’t know,” he murmured. His eyes flicked to her mouth, lipstick all but smeared off. He wiped his thumb across her lower lip, leaning in to kiss her softly. “I’d like to take it slow, that much I do know.” 

She gave him a nervous smile. “I can do slow. How about a date? Say, next weekend? We can come here – to dance,” she assured him. 

Did he want to do this? Hell, he’d already done it. A one-time deal could be ignored; chalked up to experimentation and forgotten. But he didn’t want to forget. He licked his lips, liking the way Francesca’s eyes followed the movement of his tongue. “I’m afraid I’m busy next weekend. There’s a frat party I have to be at,” he said, enjoying the downcast expression on Francesca’s face. He tugged lightly on her shirt. “You will be there, won’t you?” 

He bit his lip as he smiled, watching the dawning on her face. 

“You prick!” she huffed and smacked him on the arm. Then her expression changed. “Are you asking me out?” 

One fleeting second of panic, then he was all smiles. “I guess I am.” 

His smile was matched and surpassed by hers. “Then I guess I’m going to a frat party.” 

~~~

Adam surveyed the DOG house, liking the changes. His frat brothers mingled with the DOGs, and the majority of them behaved. Those that didn’t, he asked to leave. So far, it was turning out to be a great party. 

He grinned as he passed Doofer and his date feeding each other on the couch. Leah passed him without so much as a glance, but he shrugged and kept walking. Dave would find her soon enough, or she would find him, and they’d make up. They were too much alike to not get together. 

He stopped short as he saw Jimmy approaching. Their awkward silences were less common since Adam made it his mission to reprogram Jimmy in the ways to treat a woman. After careful deliberation, he decided that Katie would be a good match for Jimmy. She’d grown some balls – not literally – in the past few weeks, and he was pretty sure she could tame Jimmy’s sex drive. Adam wasn’t an idiot; he’d seen the flush on Katie’s cheeks at odd times of the day, and he’d heard the occasional muffled sounds from her room. With all the dildos they’d tossed at the DOG house, he’d be surprised if more women didn’t put them to good use. 

He spotted tousled dark hair entering the house, and made his way to the foyer. Frank surveyed the room, barely glancing at him. Adam had deliberately not seen Frank since their night at the club, so he could surprise him here. “Hi there,” he said. 

Frank nodded politely. “Hey. Nice party.” His eyes kept sweeping the room. 

“Thanks.” Adam bit his lip to keep from smiling. “Are you – looking for someone?” 

“Yeah, actually.” Frank looked at him – really looked. “Have we met before?” 

He tilted his head and smiled demurely. “A few weeks ago, in class.” He waited to see if Frank could guess from just that hint, but it looked like he needed a little push. “And again at a little out of the way club,” he murmured in a sotto voice. He held out his hand to an astonished Frank. “Adam.” 

Frank took his hand, gaze studying him intently. “Adina?” he hissed. 

Adam corrected him with a light, “It’s Adam in here.” He squeezed Frank’s hand, then released it and turned away, swaying his hips just a bit as he headed to the kitchen, knowing without looking that Frank would follow. 

‘Just Adam’ didn’t exist anymore, but Adina was proving to be a whole lot of fun. 

The End


End file.
